20 January 2020

Here is my story of a silent miscarriage of twins, from our first midwife appointment through to the surgery.

When we arrived at our first midwife appointment, we were asked to take a seat next to the reception. The receptionist had to check the midwife was seeing us after noticing we were still waiting after our appointment time. My height and weight were taken to calculate my BMI. I asked if I should remove my shoes but was told to keep them on, resulting in an underweight measurement as several cm were added to my height. I had been asked to bring a urine sample which the midwife didn’t want and no blood tests were taken.

At the scan, we found out we were carrying twins but there was no heartbeat. (Twins was something I had asked about at my midwife appointment, as my grandmother is a twin, but this was just dismissed as I didn’t appear nauseous enough!) The sonographer was really lovely and gave us some time to ourselves. We were then taken to another room where a midwife told us the 3 options giving us a booklet with further info.

I rang first thing the following morning only to find out I would have to wait 2 weeks for the surgery. During this time, no appointment letter came. I arrived at my pre-op appointment and was told the doctors were running late. More than half an hour after my appointment time, I was taken into an ultrasound room as no other rooms were available. (This was hard given everything that had happened). The doctor spoke to me very matter of fact which felt a little insensitive given the situation and I signed the forms. I was then taken to another room for a blood test (as this was not on the system due to it not being done at my midwife appointment). I was given some basic info about the day of surgery after asking lots of questions. I was also informed that my husband will not be able to come with me on the day and will just need to drop me off and pick me up. This has been one of the most difficult times in my life and I had to go through it alone.

On the day of surgery, I had to arrive at 7.15am. Most of the patients were there before any staff. I found out I was 5th on the list and we were moved to a second waiting room. We took it in turns to see the nurse, doctor and anesthetist and then I just had to sit and wait in my gown and dressing gown for 4 long hours whilst the surgeon worked through the list.

When I woke from the surgery, I was flustered. I felt sick and didn’t want the oxygen mask on my face. The surgery itself went well but I had lost a litre and a half of blood. My haemoglobin levels dropped throughout the day. I was kept in the surgery recovery room for 7 hours being assessed every 5 minutes and pumped with fluids, whilst my husband paced up and down at home. A blood transfusion was mentioned on several occasions but I wanted to see how I’d be without it. I didn’t want to take anymore chances. I was the last patient in the recovery room when they eventually found me a bed. I was taken up to the gynaecology ward at about 8.30pm where I finally got to see my husband. I was monitored through the night and allowed to go home late the following afternoon with iron tablets. I haven’t bled much since the surgery and I have had hardly any pains but I am very weak from the heavy blood loss. I have been signed off work and told it is going to take several weeks for me to get back to full health!

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