4 July 2015

We began our love story with 2 early miscarriages, pretty much proving that trying to make a family for us was going to have its heartache. What we didn’t realise was how much our hearts would break!

Following my first 2 early miscarriages we conceived my son Callum, who’s now 11. Following the birth of my Callum we went on to get married, the ceremony was perfect and I couldn’t wait to start trying again for a sibling or maybe even two for Callum.

We immediately began trying which resulted in further miscarriages, 6 in total.

2 questionned as ectopics, 2 blighted ovums, which meant surgery to remove empty sacs, and 2 ‘straightforward’ miscarriages, as one doctor described them.

It was then that I consulted Dr Raj at the recurrent miscarriage clinic at St Mary’s hospital in London. It was found that I had a uterine septum which was believed to be causing the miscarriages.

This was removed over the course of 2 lots of surgery and after 3 months of healing we began trying again with our hearts filled with hope.

This time was different though, there was huge difficulty in us getting pregnant, so much so and with us approaching our mid 30s we decided on IVF. To our amazement the first attempt worked!! And at our 20 week scan we were told it was a little girl!!! Life was perfect again and my family was soon to be complete.

That was until one mid morning of the 29th of June 2015 when I thought to myself “she’s been quiet today”.  I went to the hospital for some reassurance only to be told she had no heartbeat. I remember not being able to breathe and I could here screams, not realising until I was later told that those screams were mine.

I’ve been pretty much broken by the loss of my Rose for the last 2 years, we had no answers apart from ‘inconclusive’ and only 2 months ago I endured another early miscarriage, conceived with no intervention.

But I’m back in full fighting mode again now, determined never to give up, we will get there in the end. For my Rose if nothing else. Xx

This year we will all take the day off work, sit with my girl at her resting place, light candles, set off balloons and if I’m honest, we cry. Xx





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